


Super Kids and Their Unsuper Problems

by Kydove



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), WandaVision (TV)
Genre: Domestic Avengers, Explicit Language, Flash Thompson Being A Jerk, Fluff, Gen, Humor, No Spoilers, Not Canon Compliant, One Shot, Precious Peter Parker, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29879847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kydove/pseuds/Kydove
Summary: The Law of Conservation of Mass indicates that any closed system of mass must remain constant over time. Mass cannot be taken away or added. What this means for someone trying to teleport to another person on bleachers crowded by some twenty odd teenagers is that their powers must find a place occupied by mass that can be displaced by their own; which means 'empty' air.Unfortunately, sometimes the only close empty air is about two feet above the intended target.Or; Billy is upset and drops in on Peter in the middle of class.
Relationships: Wanda Maximoff & Peter Parker
Comments: 10
Kudos: 188





	Super Kids and Their Unsuper Problems

**Author's Note:**

> A) There is no timeline. I didn't even try. This is just a cute idea I had and wanted to put out there.  
> B) I don't know anything about science. That summary is probably very inaccurate.
> 
> Thanks for reading. Let me know what you think.

For the longest time Peter had been used to being the youngest person living in the Avengers Tower. At sixteen he was at least ten years younger than the next oldest Avenger, and any people related to the Avengers his own age only visited the Tower occasionally. That was until Wanda came back with two children holding her hands, too old to be hers. Billy and Tommy Maximoff, children of Wanda and Vision. It was an impossible occurrence.

Doctor Strange had been called in, and the following information was so out of Peter's depth he wasn't even sure he retained a single ounce of it. Something relating to  _ Magic _ , and  _ chaos _ , and  _ souls _ , and  _ miscast incantations _ . Peter was a genius, but he was a tech genius; the supernatural just wasn't in his repertoire. In the end the children had been declared safe, actually Wanda's, and allowed to move into the Tower. Wanda hadn't been happy about her children being practically studied beneath a microscope, but Peter had understood the necessity. After all, walking in with two ten year old boys when Wanda hadn't even been pregnant the year before was a little eyebrow raising. 

Mr. Stark ( _ seriously, kid, call me Tony. Don't make me feel any older than I am.)  _ hadn't exactly been thrilled about the prospect of two rambunctious young boys moving into the Tower, but hadn't had the cruelty to refuse. Wanda was family, and therefore so were the boys. One of the guest rooms had been refurbished for the boys, and Wanda moved back into her old room (unchanged from when she left on her "soul search"). 

Peter is happy about having Billy and Tommy at the Tower. Not only does it mean the Avengers spend less time babying  _ him _ , but he also has two people closer to his own age (though younger). He loves playing video games with boys, watching cartoons, and building Legos. When he isn't with Ned and MJ, in the lab, or patrolling as Spider-Man, he's with the boys. He'll do his homework while they watch cartoons, or read the latest chemistry paper while they bicker over the game they're playing. Oftentimes he's the one who pulls babysitting duty as well, and he doesn't mind. 

Looking after the boys is pretty easy, most of the time. Except for when it's not. It came as quite the shock, a few months after Wanda and the boys took residence in the Tower, when Billy and Tommy manifested their powers. Billy had inherited his mother's proficiency in Magic, and Tommy had inherited the superspeed his late Uncle had been known for. Babysitting the boys became a bit more of a headache after that. Billy and Tommy still fought over toys like they did before, roughhoused and bickered like before, except now one could teleport and lift things with his mind, and the other could run across the state and back before you knew he was gone.

Super kids and their unsuper problems.

\--

"I'm bored." Tommy whined from where he sat on the couch of the Avengers Tower Common Room, pausing his game on the large holographic display. He tossed the controller down next to him on the couch cushions, the device bouncing a couple times before falling to the lush carpeted floor.

From his spot laying on the floor, socked feet suspended in the air, on his stomach, Billy looked up from his book. "Then go find something to do." He said, looking back at the page he was reading. He'd read one word before the book was gone, snatched out from beneath his hands at super speed. "Hey!" He shouted, levitating into a standing position with the use of his blue tinted magic, the wisps of energy enfolding his body and lifting him up. Tommy was at the other end of the room, by the hallway that led to the Penthouse's bedrooms, turning the book over in his hands. "Give it back!" Billy hissed, eyes glowing blue.

"Come and get it!" Tommy taunted, sticking his tongue out at his twin. Then he was off, running away in a streak of blue and quicksilver. Billy growled, lifting off the floor on his magic and flying after his brother. He found his twin in their mother's room; or, more specifically, the ensuite bathroom connected to their mother's room. Tommy was standing next to the toilet, arm held over the bowl, book held treacherously between finger and thumb. 

Billy stopped short in the doorway, face morphing into an expression of horror, floating just inside the threshold. Then his face hardened, and he glared at his brother with blue-fire eyes. "Tommy, don't you dare." Billy whispered, voice wavering somewhere between a plea and a threat. His twin simply smirked and, Billy watching in increasing distress, let go of the book. "No!" Billy yelled, eyes tearing up in frustration. He didn't think after that, riding on a wave of emotion and yelled, "I'm telling Peter!". 

His mind reached out without him having to think, across the city, searching for the mind he knew. He didn't see Tommy snatch the book out of the air at lightning speed, or hear his brother's yell of "Billy, no, it was a joke!". He disappeared in a haze of blue-spectrum wisps, zeroed in on the signature of Peter Parker. 

A mind echoing  _ Noise Frustration Boredom _ .

\--

Peter's day had been incredibly boring so far. He'd had tests in his first two classes, which he'd finished in just under twenty minutes both, so most of the rest of those classes had been spent fiddling around on his phone, or working on enhancing the formula for his web fluid. He'd shared his first period with Ned, so they had chatted when the other teen finished, but they'd gotten a stink eye from the teacher and had to quiet down. Now he was in gym class, his final period before lunch, and he wanted it to be over yesterday. He had used to hate gym class because he was terrible at it and not particularly interested in getting better. Now he hated it for a completely different reason. Since the spider bite he'd gotten too good at gym class, and now his main source of frustration with the class was having to hide his new physical prowess. 

They were watching another Captain America PSA, on the importance of proper diet and exercise for a healthy lifestyle. Peter had had to hide a snicker when it first started, considering just the other he'd found Steve and Bucky eating ice cream straight from the tub while watching Indiana Jones together. He couldn't judge, though; if he'd been them he'd want to see some melting Nazi faces as well. So he sat on the bleachers, elbow on his knee and chin in his palm, while the video played and he made snarky remarks to Bed beside him.

He was bored, but bored was good. Bored was safe. He should have known it wouldn't last.

The first thing Peter notices is Coach Wilson, standing next to the television, with widening eyes. Then Peter feels the tingle at the base of his skull, the one that makes the hair on his arm stand on end, the one that screams  _ DANGER _ ; but the tingle isn't intense, not indicating anything dangerous or life-threatening, only indicating that something is  _ wrong _ . He follows Coach Wilson's line of sight, over the heads of his students,  _ right above Peter _ .

"Shit." Peter curses and Ned looks over at him sharply before following his own line of sight, the Asian boy inhaling a sharp breath and widening his own eyes.

The Law of Conservation of Mass indicates that any closed system of mass must remain constant over time. Mass cannot be taken away or added. What this means for someone trying to teleport to another person on bleachers crowded by some twenty odd teenagers is that their powers must find a place occupied by mass that can be displaced by their own; which means 'empty' air. 

Unfortunately, sometimes the only close empty air is about two feet above the intended target.

The blue-spectrum wisps above Peter waver in the air, more forming each second, before coalescing together into a solid form. There's a yelp, a high pitched screech as the figure falls, and suddenly Peter finds his lap full of 80 pounds of tear stained boy.

The reaction of his class is immediate. Some girls scream, some boys scream too, others curse, and everyone jumps back, tripping over bleachers and each other in an attempt to get away from the sudden appearance of a ten year old boy. Even Ned had jumped a little, cursing, but pretty much remained where he was.

MJ sits calmly at the top of the bleachers, raising one dark eyebrow over the cover of her book, and pulls out her Crisis Sketchbook.

Peter blinks blankly at the boy in his lap a couple times, trying to process exactly what he's seeing. Billy seems just as disjointed, looking around with wide eyes at the mass of teenagers staring at him with equally wide eyes. 

"Billy?" Peter questions, and said boy looks at him quickly, eyes turning from fear to relief.

"Peter!" Billy cries, sitting up and wrapping his skinny arms around Peter's neck. "Thank goodness, I thought I'd messed something up." Billy sniffles against the crook of Peter's neck. Peter wraps his arm around the boys back, rubbing his shoulder.

"You're fine." Peter whispers, while looking around at his class. The shock had worn off, and now they were breaking out into hushed whispers that Peter could easily hear with his enhanced senses.

"Is that a kid?"

"Where the hell did he come from?"

"How does Peter know him?"

Peter tunes them out, focusing his attention on the upset boy in his lap. "Billy, what are you doing here?" He asks. The boy pulls back, holding onto his shoulders. He looks lost for a moment, then new tears start to well up in his eyes.

"Tommy flushed my book!" Billy growls, and he rubs away his frustrated tears. 

Peter is about to ask for more details when a cough from the gym floor interrupts him. Coach Wilson looks uncomfortable and confused, "Uh, Mr. Parker...who is this?"

Billy whips his head around again, sees all the people staring at him and blushes, hugging himself close to Peter and burying his flushed face in his shoulder. Peter scratches the back of his neck with the arm that's not hugging Billy, coughing to dislodge the discomfort in his voice when he answers, "This is, uh, Billy. He's the son of a friend."

Coach Wilson doesn't look any less confused. "What is, uh...what's he doing here?"

Peter's anxiety is spiking, can feel the eyes and attention on him like pinpricks in his spine, can't stop the sassy response, "That's what I'm trying to find out." He looks back down at Billy, rubbing his back. "Billy? What did Tommy do?"

Billy sniffles, pulls back, rubs his red eyes with the back of his hand. His voice is watery when he responds. "I,I was reading, and Tommy was p-playing games, then he said he was bored and I told him to find something to do, then he took my book and ran off with it, and when I found him he was in mom's bathroom and he dropped my book in the toilet." By the end of Billy's story he was rambling, and Peter rubbed his back.

"So, Tommy flushed your book down the toilet?" Peter asked, and Billy opened his mouth to confirm but didn't get the chance.

"I did not!" Yells a voice from the gym entrance. Every head, including Billy and Peter, whips around to see Tommy standing in the open doors, green tracksuit on and hair windswept. 

"Oh, for fucks sake." Peter whispers. Billy gasps, turning to look at Peter with a shocked expression.  _ Whoops.  _ "Don't tell your mother I said that." 

"I did not put your book in the stupid toliet, you big baby!" Tommy yells, dashing across the gym at superspeed to stand beside Peter on the bleachers. The other students gasp, most not having seen exactly how Billy appeared. Tommy grabs Billy by the hood of the other boy's red sweatshirt, dragging him off Peter's lap. Billy yelps and spins around when his feet hit the bleachers, pushing Tommy away. 

"You did too! I saw you!" Billy yelled, pointing an accusatory finger at Tommy's chest. 

"I did not! It was a joke!" Tommy countered, slapping Billy's hand away. 

Peter stood up, feeling that tingling again. "Boys…" Peter tried to start.

"Stop lying!" Billy screeched. 

And shit hit the fan.

Billy's eyes glowed blue, and he shoved out his hands. Wreathed in blue magic, they sent Tommy flying off the bleachers. The students screamed, Peter yelled, Coach Wilson ducked, and Tommy hit the TV with a crack that had it toppling over. Peter was halfway down the bleachers as fast as he could without exposing his own powers, but Tommy had already gotten up quick as a flash after shaking his head.

"I'm not lying!" Tommy hissed, and ran at his brother. He tackled Billy into the bleachers, making the students scatter more. Peter couldn't turn around fast enough to keep up. 

Billy's hands were wreathed in blue energy as they sent Tommy into the air. Peter watched in slow motion as Tommy rose, the gasps of his classmates a distant whisper in his ear, up and up. Peter was sure Billy hadn't meant to use so much power, if his aghast expression was anything to go by. Both boys were still getting a sense of their powers, and how to properly control them. Tommy's arms flailed, and he screamed as gravity took hold once more. 

Peter keeps his eyes on Tommy as he runs up the bleachers in bounding steps. He gets to Billy by the time Tommy is halfway down, standing over him and arms outstretched. Tommy's weight is insignificant compared to some other stuff he's had to lift, and he catches him easily. Tommy is shaking slightly in his arms. "You're okay, Tommy, I've got you." He sets him down gently, but Tommy keeps a hold of his arm even when his feet are on the ground.

"Oh my god, Tommy, I'm sorry!" Billy cries, as he scrambles to his feet. 

"Are you two finished?" Peter asks, looking between them. They both look up at him, nodding with sullen eyes. "Good." He nods, and grabs Billy's hand, leading him and Tommy off the bleachers. His classmates part before whom like the Red Sea, looking shocked at what they'd just witnessed. 

Coach Wilson has a look in his eye when Peter reaches the bottom of the bleachers. "Quite the display of physicality, Mr. Parker."

Peter smiles sheepishly. "Must've been the adrenaline." 

"Uh huh." Coach Wilson doesn't look convinced.

"I'm still confused." A voice Peter knows all too well says from the crowd of students. Peter turns to look at Flash. "Who the hell are these kids? And why the hell are you hanging out with kids, Penis?"

Both Billy and Tommy turn sharply to look at Flash, standing shoulder to shoulder and glaring at the teenager. Billy's eyes flash blue. Tommy cracks his fists. "His name is Peter." Billy whispers. 

Flash takes a step back, and Peter almost cracks a rib from having to hold in his laughter. Flash being threatened by two ten year old boys and actually being scared was a sight to behold. From behind him, he could hear MJ scratching furiously in her sketchbook. "Yeah, okay, alright." Flash nods, and smartly, for the first time in Peter's memory, shuts the hell up.

Peter smirks. "To answer your question, Flash, if you wanna know who Billy and Tommy are, wait a bit for their mother to get here." Flash looks skeptical but keeps his mouth shut. Billy and Tommy spin around so fast they almost fall over each other. 

"Peter, no!" "Oh come on, not Mom!" They cry in unison. 

"Yes, your mother." Peter says, crossing his arms, and somewhere behind him he can hear a snicker that sounds suspiciously like Ned. He scowls, pointing to the lowest bench on the bleachers. "Sit there, and stay there while I call your mother." Both boys grumble but obey, stomping over to the bench and sitting down sullenly. Peter reaches for his pocket where he usually keeps his phone, remembers he's in his gym uniform that doesn't have pockets. His phone is in his bag in the locker room. He's about to ask Coach Wilson if he can go and get it when MJ is suddenly beside him, holding out her phone. He raises an eyebrow at her, and she just shrugs in response. 

He takes her phone, and opens up the KAREN extension he'd installed when MJ had revealed she'd uncovered his secret identity. Having more people who knew was both a blessing and a curse. He had more people he could go to for help, but more people were also at risk. KAREN would recognize his voice pattern, and make a call through his phone and reroute it to MJ's. 

KAREN's voice rings out the speaker when he opens the extension: "Good afternoon, Ms. Jones. Was there something I can help you with?" His classmates, who were whispering amongst themselves and glancing occasionally at the two sullen boys on the bench, look over quizzically at the sound of the synthesized voice. They look away at MJ's glare. 

Peter responds to the A.I. "It's me, Karen."

"Good afternoon, Peter. What do you need?" 

"Karen, can you please call…" Peter stops short when he remembers what Wanda's contact is listed as in his phone, and sighs. "Call WitchBitch." MJ raises an eyebrow, and he shrugs. 

Billy looks like he doesn't know whether to laugh or be offended on his mother's account. Tommy snickers, and Peter shoots him a glare. "I'm telling mom that's what you call her."

"Calling WitchBitch." KAREN says before Peter can respond to Tommy. He puts the ear up to his phone. It takes two rings for Wanda to answer, her Sokavian drawl echoing through the earpiece.

"Peter, what is it? Aren't you at school?" She asks. He can hear voices in the background stop chattering as soon as she speaks. She was probably in a meeting with the other Avengers.

"Yeah, I am." Peter chuckles nervously. "So are Billy and Tommy?" He isn't sure why it comes out like a question, but it does.

There's a beat of silence on the other end, then Wanda whispers harshly, "What?"

"Yeah." Peter says slowly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Guess they got in a fight, and Billy, upset, came to tell me."

"While you're at school."

"He was pretty upset, probably forgot."

"I'll be there in a moment." Wanda says, and ends the call. He hands the phone back to MJ, shoving his hands in his pockets. Coach Wilson coughs, and Peter looks at him.

"So…what's happening? Should we take them to the office?"

Peter smiles. "No need. Their mom will be here in a moment."

Coach Wilson tilts his head. "A moment? What do you mean a-" Coach Wilson doesn't get to finish his sentence. In the middle of the gymnasium was a whirlwind of scarlet smoke, spinning faster and faster as it increased in volume. He heard his classmates around him whispering. 

"No way."

"Is that what I think it is?"

As soon as the smoke appeared it dispersed, disappearing into the air. Where it had been stood none other than the Scarlet Witch herself. Despite the leather of her costume and the glint of her crown, she looked every inch a disapproving mother, hands on her hips and mouth set in a thin line. "Billy and Tommy Maximoff!" She hissed. The boys hunched in on themselves.

"Holy shit, that's the Scarlet Witch!" Peter hears Flash whisper.

"No shit, genius." Betty Brant whispers back.

Wanda doesn't seem to be paying any attention to the gaggle of teenagers staring at her with starstruck eyes; her only focus is on her children, and giving them the scolding of a lifetime.

"How dare you leave the Tower unsupervised! And interrupt Peter in the middle of school! Do you have any idea how much danger you could have been in? No one would have known where you were had something happened." 

Both boys look at their shoes. "Sorry, mom." They say in unison. 

"Sorry isn't good enough this time." Both boys look up at that. "You're both grounded for a week. No video games, no trips out, no toys." Wanda holds her hand out, counting each one on a finger. Billy and Tommy open their mouths, but Wanda wasn't finished. She slashes her hand through the air in an angry motion. " _ And  _ no movie nights with Peter."

"Awww, mom!" The boys whine. The students in the room watch the interaction with rapt fascination, not even considering a superhero could have a dispute this domestic. Unlike Peter they'd never seen Clint and Natasha battle over the last slice of pizza, or Steve baking in a frilly blue apron. Most thought the Avengers were superheroes all the time; Peter knew they were people, too. That's why the class turns to stare at Peter when he  _ whines  _ at the Scarlet Witch.

"Aw, come on, Wanda, why movie night? Why am I being punished?" Wanda turns to him, an amused glint to her eye.

"You're not being punished, Peter. But the boys need to learn a lesson." Wanda turns back to Billy and Tommy. "Come, boys. We'll talk more about this at  _ home _ , where you should have been this whole time." The boys stand, shuffling their feet and looking like their world had ended. An entire week without anything to do; and to think, this all started with Tommy being bored. Wanda looks at Peter with a warm expression, "Thanks for taking care of them, Peter. I'll want you to tell me everything when you get to the Tower."

More whispers break out among the herd of students at that, and Flash looks likes he's going to choke on his tongue.

"No problem, Wanda." Peter says, inwardly screaming. This entire debacle is getting to close to home. Literally. None of his classmates are aware he lives at Avengers Tower. Some are only aware, and fewer believe, that he interns there in the R&D Wing. That's his only available excuse. "Can I say bye to twins?" 

Wanda smiles fondly, pushing the boys toward him gently. They run to him, Tommy getting there first, naturally, and hug him around waist, faces pressed into his sides. He hugs them closer, bending down slightly. "I won't mention the brawl if you won't." He whispers. He can feel them grin through his t-shirt.

"Alright, come on boys." Wanda says, Billy and Tommy reluctantly pulling away to start their new week of punishment. Wanda places her hands on one their shoulders, and soon they're gone in a whirl of scarlet smoke.

The bell for the start of lunch rings, breaking the silence that had followed the Scarlet Witch's departure. Excited whispering broke out, and Coach Wilson could barely be heard over the din. "Well, that's class for today, I guess. See you here tomorrow." He left the room quickly, looking somewhat dazed. Peter wondered if Coach Wilson drank. Peter didn't drink; but he felt like he might want to start. He tries to leave just as quickly, but there's a hand on his shoulder pulling him back.

"What the shit, Penis? What the hell was that?" It seemed without the threat of two superpowered ten year olds, Flash had regressed into his usual douchy self.

Peter gulps. "What was what?"

Flash looks likes he wants to punch him. Peter wonders if this is one he can dodge, or one he'll need to take. " _ How the fuck do you know the Scarlet Witch? _ "

Peter tries for nonchalance, is pretty sure he fails, "You know, my internship."

Flash glares at him. "Seem pretty chumy with her kids for an intern."

Peter's palms are sweaty. There's nothing for it but a twisted version of the truth. "Well, I mean, I'm kinda Tony Stark's personal intern."

Whispers break out, and Flash looks speechless for second before very unattractivly snorting, "Yeah, okay, good luck proving that one. I don't know what the fuck that was, but there's no way you know Tony Stark." But theres a flush crawling up Flash's neck.

Peter shakes himself free, heading for the gym exit, shrugging. "It's my internship." He hopes hell never have to actually prove it. Anybody getting too close to Peter's relationship with the Avengers was getting too close to Spider-Man. He heads to the locker room to grab his stuff, planning to change in one of the bathrooms where he can be alone.

He prays nothing more could reveal how close he was to the Avengers; but knowing his luck, something bound to happen.

\--

MJ holds up her Crisis Notebook for him when they sit down at lunch. Inside is a sketch of him hugging Billy and Tommy to his sides, a stern but fond expression on his face.

"You make a great big brother." MJ smirks.

Peter blushes, mumbles, "Thanks." and embarrassingly digs into his shitty cafeteria food while MJ looks at him with an amused glint in her eye. Peter looks dejected at his soggy chicken nuggets and limp fries, rolling one nugget over with his fork.

He should have asked Billy to get him some of Steve's lasagna from the fridge.

\--

Later that night, lying in bed at Avengers Tower, Peter gets a text from MJ. Multiple images. All sketches of Flash's face looking between a mix a nauseous, constipated, and furious. Peter's laugh is loud in the dark quiet of the Tower.

"Go to sleep, Peter!" Tony yells.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if Billy can actually teleport. When I first watched episode 9 of WandaVision I thought Wanda and Agatha were teleporting, but it now occurs to me that may have only been invisibility. I don't read the comics, either.


End file.
